Saturday, April 7, 2007

Technical Assistance

This was a forward from Michele... too funny to dump in the deleted files right away.


Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance -- Particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0, and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed, Desperate


Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: "http: I Thought You Loved Me.HTML" and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

9 comments:

goddessdivine said...

I've seen this before. Really cute.

PRP said...

Hilarious! Thanks for the chuckle...

tharker said...

I loved this! Isn't it the truth?!

lindsay>boo said...

That is really funny! By the way, just wanted to post to let you know I'm still alive!

hatch said...

This is really funny and so true!

Marilyn said...

Very clever! Hilarious.

Alicia said...

I've gotten this before, too. It always makes me laugh.

Melissa said...

Very funny! I've read one that is just the opposite about "Wife 1.0" Not nearly as amusing as this one though :) Thanks for stopping by my blog! I love meeting new bloggers!

Naomi Joy said...

o wow...now i just can't wait to get married!!